Funny Retirement Quotes Funny Quotes About Life About Friends And Sayings About Love About School Tumblr Tagalog For Kids About Girls

Funny Retirement Quotes Biography

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I retired early for health reasons - my company was sick of me and I was sick of them.

Gainfully unemployed, very proud of it, too.

Retirement life begins when the kids move out and the cat gets run over.

Happiness is being retired and spending all of my kids' inheritance before I die!

The money is no better in retirement but the hours are!

Retirement: When you quit working just before your heart does.

My retirement plan is to find a shopping cart with good snow tires.

He or she who laughs last at the boss's jokes probably isn't far from retirement.

Retirement is wonderful. It's doing nothing without worrying about getting caught at it.

There is life after retirement, and it is BETTER.

Yes, I am thoroughly enjoying retirement! The best part is observing my neighbors drive off to work in the morning knowing that that their day will be filled with jerks, brainless and endless meetings, jerks, vendor lunches where you hold your breath just waiting for the sales pitch until you regurgitate your pasta, more jerks and the eventual company reorganization of the section that was just reorganized last month!

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The best time to start thinking about Your retirement is before the boss does.
When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income. *
I’m not just retiring from the company, I’m also retiring from my stress, my commute, My alarm clock, and my iron.
Before you speak, listen. Before you write, think. Before you spend, earn. Before you invest, investigate. Before you criticize, wait. Before you pray, forgive. Before you quit, try. Before you retire, save. Before you die, give.
There are some who start their retirement Long before they stop working.
Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.
Don’t simply retire from something; Have something to retire to
When one door closes, another one opens, but we often look so long and regretfully at the closed door that we fail to see the one that has opened for us.

There are three things to remember when teaching: know your stuff; know whom you are stuffing; and then stuff them elegantly.
Old teachers never die; They just grade away. Retirement: It’s nice to get out of the rat race, but you have to learn to get along with less cheese.
A professor is one who talks in someone else’s sleep.
The challenge of retirement is how to spend time without spending money.
The splendid thing about education is that everyone wants it. Like influenza, you can give it away without losing any of it yourself.

Funny Retirement Quotes Funny Quotes About Life About Friends And Sayings About Love About School Tumblr Tagalog For Kids About Girls

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